Birthday: 14th October Occupation: Cultivator; Moulder; Nurturer Currently I am inspired: To renovate my blog
To start on my next phase of new life in 2007
Now I remembered what I wanted to blog about. This takes place over the first round of our Maths test. 2 other colleagues took this test as well... MG and TJ.
(Background story: The official day of the release of the results was on last Monday, 20th June. But it was released on 19th June. So, I knew that MG passed and TJ and myself failed. So the 3 of us met up after the Nie registration talk on Monday.)
MG: So how? SMMT?
Me: Got to retake loh... I failed it!
MG: Izzit??!! Nevermind you can take it again.
Me: You dunno meh? The results were out last night on the internet. You passed right? So good...
MG: Izzit? I just checked it on the board just now.
(Just then, TJ comes along.)
TJ: Wah lau... I failed leh... The 2 of you how? The results were out last night.
MG: Yah... I checked on the internet last night.
(.... If MG checked on the internet last night, why did she feign ignorance?)
Hypocrisy part #2:
(Background story: This took place on last Friday. MG and I decided to leave school early and makan at AMK Ave 10. We were in the car and the conversation started from the car to the coffeeshop.)
MG: So... how do you find AJ?
Me: (Being cautious here) AJ got good and bad points lah... Good is because they give you lots of training. Very structured....
(And the whole conversation continued on to the teachers.)
MG: Eh.. your HOD and that W very fierce leh... how do you find them? (To those who are naive, MG is testing the waters and asking how I feel about them, as a gauge to see if I am having any gripes in AJ...)
Me: Aiyah... on appearance, they are very fierce but actually they are very nice. They dun bite but bark. And they are very experienced. (they actually are...)
MG: Izzit? Do they teach well?
Me: They are experienced so of course, they teach well. My HOD's lessons are very short and sweet but Mrs Tan tends to be a bit strict with them. But still, their classes are structured and well-done. (Actually, between W and my HOD, my HOD is better. W's lessons tend to be boring, sian and she has no "click" with her students at all.)
Then I tested the waters, to see how genuine she is...
Me: So... how about your department? You like your department? Any teachers shining?
(I asked this question cos she was asking me about 2 powerhorses in my school and they are very young teachers.)
MG: Aiyah in my department, everyone is helpful and friendly. And all the teachers are shining. There are some really nice teachers like XXX, YYY....
*end of story telling*
I am convinced that I have seen her true colours. Firstly, I didn't like the fact that she was fishing out information from me to assess her competition level. I mean, yah, I know she is smart and probably will rise if she becomes a full-fledged teacher, but I didn't like how she was going round and round assessing who are her competitors to decide if she should stay on in that school after training.
I cannot stand the way she pretended not to know my results. Yah... she was complaining that she didn't have the mood to study and that she never study. Not that I truly believed her words but wah piang, we are already adults! Can she stop this crappy shit?
This is a reminder to me, that even though teaching can be quite a sheltered profession, there are still some sickening people who can never grow up. If you want more information, give more information. It's like an exchange. If you want people to trust you, you have to trust them.
Secondly, the idea of competition still boils in. Even though we are assessed somewhat by some govtal standards, the competition is boiling already, even before we are full-fledged teachers. MG is a smart girl and I have to admit I have a lower aptitude than her. But I am sure going to work damn hard to do as well as I can for NIE. I want to strive for some award in NIE, if there is...
The whole rationale is that... if you do well in NIE, you will be in demand by the schools so... better start young.
Thirdly, religion. MG has no religion and she is an aethist. This is rather indirect here but I feel that some spirituality gives you some form of direction and wisdom in your life. The spirituality will guide you in gauging how much you should divulge and whether you should trust the person or not. For MG, she has no direction. Hers was just simply whack... if a person tells me more, hooray! If not, then too bad lor. In other words, she is making friends to her own advantage and I guess she is never happy. I hate it when she sniggers at religion. $%#^&@
She relies on her own abilitiy to pass the maths test but I rely on my ability and on God to do so. In other words, self-sufficiency versus dependency. To survive in this dog-eat-dog world, we cannot be self-sufficient but we need to be dependent onto someone, not on earth but at a higher order, a supreme being and in my case, my God in Heaven.
